


To Pine, and Pine, and Pine Again

by INMH



Series: Merry Month of Masturbation Fills (2020) [27]
Category: BioShock Infinite
Genre: Alcohol, Drama, M/M, Masturbation, Merry Month of Masturbation Challenge, Romance, Sexual Content, Strong Language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-27
Updated: 2020-05-27
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:55:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24227692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/INMH/pseuds/INMH
Summary: Robert may have asmallcrush on Booker.
Relationships: Booker DeWitt/Robert Lutece
Series: Merry Month of Masturbation Fills (2020) [27]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1690234
Kudos: 32





	To Pine, and Pine, and Pine Again

Robert’s not sure what it is.  
  
Maybe it’s the fact that Booker is an impressive physical specimen, even after years of heavy drinking; it clearly hasn’t stopped him from keeping fit, and Robert would be lying to himself if he didn’t find fit men attractive.  
  
Maybe it’s the dry wit; Robert can’t deny that he’s huffed a chuckle or two when Booker spits out some acerbic comment about Comstock or his men, or the mad situation that he and Elizabeth find themselves in.  
  
Or maybe, over the unfurling of so many different realities, Robert has simply come to see enough of the good in Booker DeWitt to develop an attraction based on more than simple physicality. Enough to make him overlook the bad.  
  
Of course, if he ever overlooks it _too_ much, Rosalind is kind enough to remind him of it.  
  
“He’s a thug who sold his baby. Kindly don’t forget that.”  
  
Robert offers his sister a withering look. “Oh, I won’t- and if I do, _would you kindly_ remind me? _Would you kindly_ tell me about Booker’s sins, before you go running off back to Rapture to pine over Brigid Tenenbaum? _Would you kindly,_ sister?”  
  
This is usually the point where Rosalind moodily drops the conversation.  
  
They go back and forth in this vein often, and it accomplishes nothing beyond reminding Rosalind that she ought not to be judging his romantic interests when her own was hardly a saint.  
  
It’s rare for them to be apart, but occasionally they manage it; they are together by choice, not by force. Sometimes Robert explores Columbia, sometimes Rapture, sometimes London, sometimes other countries or times and places. At some point, however, he usually found himself checking in on Booker.  
  
“Not you again,” Booker sighs, rolling his eyes and then doing a double-take. “Where’s the other one?”  
  
“Rosalind? Going about her own business, I presume.”  
  
Booker eyes Robert with suspicion. “And what’s your business?”  
  
This particular incarnation of Booker DeWitt doesn’t know Robert so well yet, and he doesn’t remember that Robert is the man he sold his daughter to eighteen years ago. Probably better if he doesn’t recall that just yet, if Robert’s being honest.  
  
“Simply enjoying the day, Mr. DeWitt.”  
  
And Robert happens to be enjoying this particular day by stalking Booker.  
  
Were circumstances different, Robert might have tested the waters, thrown out some signals and seen what arose from them; because Comstock has hinted in the past that ‘inappropriate interest in other men’ was one among his many former sins, cleansed by God on the day of his baptism.  
  
So there’s a _chance_ , at least.  
  
(Robert doesn’t say that to Rosalind, though, because he already _knows_ what’ll come of it and he’s not interested in another lecture.)  
  
Robert observes Booker from afar, many Bookers time after time when his and Rosalind’s efforts inevitably fail and Booker and Elizabeth are, once again, separated by death. Each failure is a small, pointed injury to Robert: As the one who took Anna DeWitt from Booker’s arms and handed her over to his older, crueler self, he feels a particular sort of culpability in these circumstances; Rosalind sees it all as an inevitability and doesn’t think any amount of tampering will change it.  
  
Robert disagrees.  
  
(Is it his attraction to Booker that drives him towards seeking redemption, or has his quest for redemption encouraged an attraction for the man?  
  
Questions, questions.)  
  
It’s after he watches Booker drag himself out of the waters of the Battleship Bay for the five-thousandth time (not quite an exaggeration, at this point), after he’s soaked to the bone and stumbling across the beach that Robert feels a familiar stirring, the physical feature of his attraction that he doesn’t often has a chance to linger on.  
  
It occurs to him that Booker is right there, that he can go and proposition him if he likes; Robert’s unique situation means that if Booker reacts badly and throws a punch, it wouldn’t actually do him any harm. Robert rejects the idea on the simple fact that his odds of success are ridiculously low, and Booker is so early in the journey that Robert doesn’t want to put him off-course somehow- Booker will need Robert and Rosalind’s help later.  
  
No… Best to take care of it himself.  
  
Robert returns to his and Rosalind’s home (a version of it that’s still standing, at any rate) and heads to the bathroom- he doesn’t really need it anymore, but at least Rosalind will hesitate to enter if she decides to come looking for him; _some_ of their old sensibilities survived the ‘accident’, after all, and one would not barge into a bedroom or bathroom knowing the other is present inside.  
  
It isn’t so much that Robert has never masturbated before- aside from being homosexual in a time and place where such inclinations are illegal at best and dreadfully taboo at worst, among other things he and Rosalind share a distinct inability to form and maintain relationships with others. In this respect, his right hand has been a good friend to him over the years.  
  
No, the problem is that Robert hasn’t actually masturbated since the ‘accident’ and as such is somewhat out of practice, as well as being uncertain as to how his current state might affect the act.  
  
It feels awkward, pulling his trousers and underwear down in the silence of the bathroom. There’s a lack of natural progression to the act, in that he had just previously been at Battleship Bay and was now in his own bathroom, well away from the beach. It lacks the slow build up that his previous self-stimulation sessions had had. So Robert shuts his eyes and moves his hand slowly, tries to ease into it somewhat. He thinks pleasantly of Booker’s physique, the way it might feel to be touched by him intimately. He thinks about how the other man’s stubble might feel on his cheek, about tasting alcohol on his lips and the tight grip of Booker’s hands on his hips. Robert sighs and settles in even as his body tenses with arousal.  
  
If the stars should align and (a) Booker should succeed at saving (an) Elizabeth and escaping Columbia safely, maybe Robert will _try_ to approach him one day; maybe one day he and Rosalind will reinstate themselves in the flow of time and resume some semblance of normal lives amongst normal people. Rosalind seems repelled by the idea, but Robert finds himself considering it.  
  
Under the right circumstances, of course.  
  
(And if there’s something- or someone- to stay reinstated for.)  
  
Robert grunts as orgasm comes, and tenses and gasps just the way he used to- but there’s no issue, no mess to clean up. This wasn’t terribly shocking, given that typical necessary bodily functions had been beyond him and Rosalind since the ‘accident’. He isn’t sweating either, and it is strangely convenient that he can simply tuck himself back into his trousers with no clean-up necessary. There isn’t a hair out of place when he looks in the mirror, although he still straightens his clothing compulsively so that Rosalind harbors no suspicions later.  
  
He sighs and runs a hand through his hair before stepping from the bathroom the conventional way, rather than simply popping into the hallway the way he and Rosalind tend to do nowadays. He does miss being ‘normal’, so to speak; living entirely without limits was fascinating for a time, but quickly became boring. There is so little challenge to be found in his existence now, in his given form and circumstances.  
  
The only _real_ challenge, at present, is driving a reunion between Booker DeWitt and his lost daughter.  
  
Robert walks down the stairs like a normal man, maintaining the illusion until he reaches the front door. He lingers for a moment, remembering- and then pops away to find Rosalind, content to let Booker alone for now.  
  
Perhaps one day, one reality, things will be different.  
  
For now, they stay the same.  
  
-End


End file.
